I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
i think i just lost a toe
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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