I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
