I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Randomize
