How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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