Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
No subtext here. People are naked.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
