doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
i'm stoned. there's a jazz trio playing outside across the street...scared that mike myers will appear & start yelling 'woman...WHOA MAN. WHOOOA MAN.' i'm snapping my fingers.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
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