I puked a lego.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
