It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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