sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Randomize
