"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
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