They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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