member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
