He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
he wants to bone in the snuggie
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
Randomize
