where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
