I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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