Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
