I murdered the dance floor call the cops
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
