is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
worst night to have a conscience
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
