she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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