I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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