he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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