If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
We are two peas in an std pod
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Randomize
