Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
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