She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
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