is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
