im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
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