we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
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