I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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