My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
I just want nice things and good sex
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
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