I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
We don't watch enough power rangers
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Randomize
