i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
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