Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
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