I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
i already hear my dad disowning me
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Randomize
