ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
