Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
We left an ass print on the piano.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
