i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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