you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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