Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
