My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
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