Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
Randomize
