Someone shit on the floor
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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