How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
No more Irish car bombs ever.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
