I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
