I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
