Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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