I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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