I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
In other news, I just burned my penis
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
