Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
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