you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
Randomize
