Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
