my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Randomize